From stomachaches to heartbreak: How emotions show up
By Dr. Veronica Dumas, Psy.D., featured in Miami Shores Living Magazine
Published on 10/15/26
We tend to think that emotions happen only in our minds, but think about the language we use every day to describe them:
butterflies in my stomach, a lump in my throat, a broken heart, a weight on my shoulders.
Our emotional and physical selves are very much interconnected. Anxiety can race through the heart, grief can feel like your body is exhausted, stress can disrupt sleep and digestion, and depression can feel physically heavy. Our bodies seem to recognize distress before our minds can put it into words.
Learning to listen to our bodies does not mean that every symptom is psychological. Physical symptoms must be evaluated by a physician and receive proper attention, but adding some curiosity about the whole person may help us find more integrative solutions. Stopping to ask ourselves: What is happening in my body and what is happening in my life?, might shed some light into unexplained physical symptoms.
When Feelings Show up as Physical Symptoms
This can be especially visible in children. A four-year-old may not be able to say “being away from you during school hours makes me anxious”. A school-age-child may struggle to express social anxiety, academic pressure or feeling excluded from a friend group. Instead, a parent might hear “my tummy hurts”, “I’m nauseous” or “I have a headache”.
Although research has found an important association between anxiety and gastrointestinal issues in children, the relationship is complex, and can operate in both directions (Kumar & Vallabhaneni, 2025). Because the discomfort is real, we don’t want to minimize the physical symptoms of the child. But once the medical concerns have been properly addressed, we may want to become curious: When does your stomach hurt? What happens before it starts? What are you thinking about when you start to notice it?
When we teach children to recognize their body´s emotional language, we are teaching them a tool they can use for life.
The Conversation Between Your Gut and Your Brain
Children are not the only ones whose stomachs respond to stress. The gastrointestinal system and the nervous systems communicate through a complex, bidirectional network commonly called the gut-brain axis. Research continues to demonstrate extensive communication among the gut, the nervous system, the immune system and the brain (Aburto & Cryan, 2024; Meershaert & Chiu, 2025).
This in no way means that gastrointestinal issues are “all in your head”. Quite the opposite. It reminds us that the traditional separation between psychological and physical health can be misleading, and we need to look at the bigger picture.
Heartbreak Really Can Hurt
Perhaps one of the most fascinating examples comes from research on rejection. In a randomized study, participants who took acetaminophen, the active ingredient in Tylenol, reported less social pain than those who received a placebo (DeWall et al., 2010).
Another study looked at people who had recently experienced an unwanted romantic breakup. When they viewed a photograph of the person who had rejected them and focused on the breakup, researchers found activation in brain regions also involved in physical pain (Kross et al. 2011).
Caution! This does not mean that heartbreak should be treated with Tylenol, or that emotional and physical pain are identical. But it does offer a very interesting explanation for something human beings have described for centuries: emotional pain can hurt.
Anxiety, Depression and Trauma Show up in our Bodies
Anxiety does not always begin with the thought “I’m anxious¨. It may arrive as a racing heart, shallow breathing, nausea, muscle tensions, dizziness or insomnia. Many people show up in the emergency room, thinking that there is something seriously physically wrong with them, only to discover it was a panic attack. Again, physical symptoms should never be ignored, but a stress response should be considered as a possibility.
In the same way, depression is not always extreme sadness. It can show up as fatigue, changes in sleep and/or appetite, body aches and pains, slowed movement, and a general feeling of physical heaviness.
Trauma can be equally embodied. And trauma does not only mean childhood abuse or neglect. A car accident, a frightening medical experience, a sudden loss, witnessing violence, or any overwhelming event can produce a long lasting cascade of physical and emotional responses, even after the danger has passed. A simple noise can be a reminder of the event and trigger a racing heart, tension, stomach upset, hypervigilance, or an urge to escape.
Relationships and Loneliness Live in the Body Too
Think about how your body feels around someone you trust. Now think about being in a relationship where you are constantly criticized, anticipating conflict or walking on eggshells. Chronic interpersonal stress can affect sleep, digestion, tension, anxiety and general wellbeing.
And what happens when connection disappears ?
A large meta analysis of 90 studies involving more than 2.2 million people found that social isolation was associated with 32% higher risk of all cause mortality and loneliness with a 14% higher risk (Wang et al., 2023).
Human connection is essential for physical health. And this applies to the teenager feeling excluded, the person going through a divorce, the empty nester adjusting to a quieter home or the older adult grieving a spouse or a shrinking social circle.
Learning your Body´s Language
So how do we listen without becoming afraid of every physical sensation?
Try the following five steps:
NOTICE: What am I experiencing physically?
NAME: What emotion might be present?
LOCATE: Where am I feeling it?
CONNECT: What happened before this began? Is there a pattern?
RESPOND: What is it that I might need?
Sometimes the answer is sleep, movement, connection, creative expression, setting a boundary, or having a difficult conversation. Sometimes we need a medical evaluation, and sometimes we need psychological support in order to understand and change patterns that have become difficult to manage alone.
If you are experiencing physical symptoms or discomfort that you suspect may be connected to stress, anxiety, trauma or other emotional experiences, you don't have to explore that connection alone. At Baypoint Counseling Center our therapists offer specialized approaches addressing the mind-body connection. We offer somatic therapy, mindfulness, and EMDR among other modalities to help you ease the emotional and physical pain. Check our website and team for more details.
About The Author: Dr. Veronica Dumas, Psy.D., is the founder of Baypoint Counseling Center and a Licensed Clinical Psychologist with more than 30 years of experience in the mental health field. She works with individuals and couples, helping them navigate relationship challenges, life transitions, and opportunities for personal growth, with specialized expertise in intensive couples therapy.
